'˜What has the EU ever done for us?'

Have you made your mind up yet? Are you in or out? Are you undecided still? Did Cameron's whistle stop visit to the area convert you to the Remain camp? Or did Boris' drive-bye through Alfreton the other week leave you clamouring to close our borders?

Do you think England will be in a better or worse financial state if we Brexit?

Do you care?

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Do you just really dislike economic migrants? Is that all the EU Referendum is about for you?

Are you bored of it? Can’t you wait for it to end?

In case you need a helping hand to make up your mind, here are a few general observations on the European Union.

- It is extremely annoying. It makes up some really stupid rules about what shape bananas should be, and when you can legally call cheese Feta.

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- Oh, but it also means that you can only call a Cornish Pasty a Cornish Pasty if it is made in Cornwall - not in an industrial park on the outskirts of Luton.

- As a member of the EU we are committed to a free movement of people amongst member states - so we get all these foreigners rocking up here, taking all those jobs that none of us want at Sports Direct.

- The Poles have brought their own lager with them . . . which is very nice.

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- Oh, and that also means that we can all move anywhere we like in the European Union - France, Spain, Italy, Germany - to work, to retire, to have a second home. I’m sure there are communities in Spain that are equally fed up with drunken Brits . . . but you know, it’s sort of good for business!

- And a lot of these foreigners are rocking up here and taking jobs that we are not qualified to do, or there is a real shortage for, like for doctors and nurses. And the reason there is such a shortage is because a lot of our doctors and nurses have sacked it off for an easier life and more money in Australia.

- Some business leaders and academics think that we would be placed in financial jeopardy if we leave the EU, because a lot of our current prosperity is based on direct trade with the EU. Other business leaders and academics disagree and say we could trade with the Commonwealth, America, and China.

- Nobody actually knows - but politicians just grab the arguments that support their position . . . and rubbish the ones that don’t.

Still, soon be over . . . one way or another.

Andy Done-Johnson

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