Sutton comedian finds snoring can now be blamed on Covid-19

And now there’s a new one to add to that list – it could be making us snore more.

Oh, the cruelty, a virus that makes us snore more but also stops us being able to sleep in an Airbnb to get some escape.

I read an interview with a sleep expert, Stephen Makinde, who claimed that being trapped indoors could make us snore more when we’re asleep.

My first response was to think this was nonsense but than I realised, maybe this could be something else to blame my snoring on, so I read further.

You see, I am a snoring sufferer.

Well, I don’t suffer as much as the other-half, I don’t hear it because I am asleep at the time.

The snoring has stopped by the time I am woken by a sharp prod and the words, ‘you’re snoring again’, shouted at me like she’s been possessed.

It’s hard to deal with because it’s not deliberate.

I don’t lie there pretending to be asleep and making those loud snoring sounds just to keep her awake, although, now I have thought of that, it’s a great move which I’ll remember for the future.

I have always believed that snoring evolved to scare off big animals.

What may be annoying now would have been keeping us safe in our caves a few epochs ago.

That argument never seems to calm down anyone I’ve been sharing a bed with, though.

I can’t think why.

Snoring isn’t deliberate but it has felt like my fault.

In the past experts have said it may be linked to obesity, so the more I snore the more it felt like I should diet and exercise.

But now I can blame it on the pandemic.

The theory is that the feeling of being trapped in our surroundings can manifest itself as a physical restriction with our breathing.

Maybe it’s the feeling of being physically restricted by clothes that used to fit too.

I read more of the interview with the sleep expert and he said that being forced to spend more time with your partner in an unhappy relationship might make your snoring worse.

What can be done?

We can’t get out of the house more, we can’t feel better about the stressful time we’re living in, but our partners can be nicer to us.

It’s either that or sleep on our sides, but it’s worth a try.

Steve N Allen is a comedian and broadcaster who was raised in Sutton-in-Ashfield. He currently stars in The Mash Report on BBC2.