Celebrity birthday parties are the new way to rebel, says Sutton funnyman

In a year like 2020 there is so much that used to be better in the olden days.
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In the 1960s famous rebels would break rules, set fire to guitars on stage or trash a hotel room.

What do celebrities do these days?

They have too many people at their birthday parties.

Chad columnist Steve N AllenChad columnist Steve N Allen
Chad columnist Steve N Allen

Be it Sky News reader Kay Burley turning 60 or singer, and advert giant, Rita Ora turning 30, they both overstepped the mark.

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It’s not that hard to stick to the rules, but the problem is entitlement.

It seems like people on TV think they are more entitled to do as they please than the rest of us.

When you have someone fetching your coffees you must start to feel special.

And everyone feels more entitled around their birthday.

We act like the fact the Earth has done a lap means we should be treated like a prince or princess.

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When you add celeb status to a birthday, no wonder we saw rules being broken.

I have less respect for modern stars. In the old days the rebellious nature of celebrities was a statement.

The message was, ‘why should I have to stick to your rules?’

In 2020 the rebellious acts of the rich and famous are done in secret and only come to light if they are caught.

Throwing a TV out of a hotel window took effort.

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Back then the televisions had cathode ray tubes in them and weighed a ton.

Thanks to OLED technology you can lift the hotel tellies with one had.

They’d float down from the window like a leaf.

Rita Ora offered to pay a fine before she was even asked to pay one.

All that shows is that a monetary fine is no deterrent to the rich and famous.

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When I was doing my GCSEs I saw a fellow pupil break a pipette in a science lesson.

When the teacher spotted it the student said, “it’s not my fault, you idiot.”

The teacher said: “You’ll have to pay £8 for the breakage. I would have let you off but it’s £8 for the insult.”

The pupil replied: “Okay, have £16, you fat ****!”

I don’t know where that student ended up, but wherever he is, I bet he had a big birthday this year.